When the Muse is a Bitch, or How I’m Surviving the Holidays
People have been asking about my insights into the Heathen life on board the Facebook page, so I’d like to give you some ideas how I celebrate, or don’t celebrate. Taking a breath here…
When You Can’t Get in the Yule Spirit
I have a confession to make: I am not in the Yule spirit. Or the Christmas spirit. Or any other fucking spirit. I know the holidays are around the corner, but I can’t really feel the part yet. Hels bells, I don’t even have the tree up.
When She’s Not in the Mood
This time of year reminds me how lonely being the lone Heathen of the Apocalypse can be. What’s more, life has a way of shoving you back into reality. If you’re going through difficult times, you probably understand what I’m talking about. Life doesn’t always hand you roses, so as the saying goes, when handed lemons, you make lemonade.
I think part of the reason has to do with the end of general season hunting. Sure, we can still hunt for grouse and turkey, but both are being wily and frustrating. Recently I lost my two goat kids to weird shit that happened two days apart. And work has hit a slow down, and I need to figure out ways to fill in the ample gaps. I’m concerned over the shit that I have to deal with every winter, which means I should expect this, but sometimes I just don’t.
It’s enough to piss off Spiderman.
It’s Times Like These…
It’s times like these where the gods and goddesses get an earful from me, but surprisingly, all I’ve been asking for is strength to put myself back on track. Okay, that’s bullshit. I don’t lie well. I do ask for help, but honestly, I know better than to expect handouts. So, I look at what I can do to make things happen more positively this season.
Remember, Tyra, the gods aren’t your bitches. <deep breath>
So, how do you handle the holidays when your life isn’t making you jolly?
Center Yourself and Take Care of Yourself First
 |
| Thanks to Magickal Graphics |
As a Heathen, it’s important to understand that you are responsible for your life, despite all the curve balls the Wyrd throws at you. You cannot fix things if you’re sick, exhausted, or emotionally spent. You’ll spend your time digging a deeper hole rather than filling it. Even if you don’t want to be honest with everyone else (which you should be), you need to be honest to yourself. You have to take care of yourself first. I learned this lesson when Tyr — and then, Loki — showed up in my life. Even now, I remind myself (often in Loki’s nagging voice) to self-care. I remember to exercise, eat right, and yeah, try to get enough sleep. And I try to meditate, even if only for minutes at a time.
Consider New Options
A huge failure I see with people is refusing to step out of their current situation. I’m as guilty as the next party with that. Sometimes we don’t take the next step because it will shake up the status quo, which may not be comfortable, but is often more comfortable than dealing with change and the unknown. Eons ago when I was younger, but not wiser, I went from job to job when I really hated the corporate culture or the people I worked for. As one gets older, the change gets to be a hassle, but sometimes you’ve got to do it. I would look at people who worked at a company for 10 to 15 years, even though they hated it. Some actually died at their desks from heart attacks. Don’t be like them.
Remember: there are always options. Understanding this will help you make your decisions.
 |
| Thanks to Magickal Graphics |
Lastly, Force Yourself to Enjoy the Season
I insisted that my husband help me take out the Yule/Christmas tree now. With much fussing and fuming, we got the tree and the ornaments out tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll be so fed up with the damn box, we’ll put up the tree. Which will make both of us feel better.
Yeah, it sounds weird, but by doing things that should make you happy, they make you happy. Even now, as I write this, I feel better that I got that done. I should probably bottle that cherry mead that has been waiting for me patiently…
—
Yeah, it’s time for me to shill for my premium content. If you’re in the giving mood, consider brightening my day a bit and subscribing to my premium channel for just $1. For $1, you unlock all the goodness of my past premium posts, get all new posts early, content not found anywhere else, plus you’ll have a private forum to chat with me and the other premium subscribers. You’ll get a free ebook, free wallpaper, and so much more. Check out my Patreon page and support The Rational Heathen.
The Yule Goat Sneaks Heathen Tradition into Christmas
If you’re new to Heathenism, or even if you’ve been a Heathen for a while, you may or may not have seen the Julbock or Yule Goat as part of the Yule celebration. The Yule Goat or Julbock is a pagan Scandinavian tradition that predates Christianity that sneaked into Christmas celebrations in Scandinavia. It’s an interesting tradition that we can easily incorporate into our Yule festivities.
What is the Julbock?
You may be wondering what the Yule Goat is and what significance it has for Heathens. After all, a goat is a goat, right? Well, maybe.
The Julbock is associated with the last sheaf of grain harvested, which in the past was considered to have magical properties. Called the julbocken, it was associated with proto-Slavic beliefs with the god of the harvest and the fertile sun, Devac, represented by a white goat. It was common for someone to dress up as a goat and demand presents as offerings. In this way, Yule was part of the harvest festival that has been carried into the winter solstice, perhaps as a way to entice the sun to return by paying tribute.
Historians think the Yule Goat may be linked to Thor’s goats, Tanngrisnir and Tanngnjóstr in many respects. Given that Thor provides rains and Sif, his consort, is the goddess of grain, you can kind of see the relationship and symbolism.
The current Julbock appears in Scandinavian tradition as straw tied with red ribbons in the shape of a goat. The Gävle Goat is Sweden is probably the best known Julbock since 1966. Not surprisingly, it has been vandalized by arson at least 36 times and has been hit by cars, kicked to pieces, and stolen. Apparently it is too big of a temptation to not offer it to the sun.
Julbock Festivities
In the past, the Julbock kept watch to ensure the Yule, and later Christmas, preparations were done correctly. It seems to be a benevolent Krampus in that respect. In medieval times, the Julbock was associated with wassailing, playing pranks, and performing plays. Youths in costumes would go house to house singing and performing plays for food and spirits. These plays would often feature a Julbock in them.
In the 19th century, the Julbock was the bringer of presents before the whole Santa Claus thing took hold in Scandinavia. An adult male relative of the house would dress up as a goat and hand out presents. This eventually faded out as the Santa Claus tradition took hold in the latter half of the 19th century. Even so, there is at least one piece of art showing a rather pagan Santa Claus riding a goat. This artwork is entitled “Old Christmas” which gives us an interesting mix of the two traditions.
How to Add the Julbock in Your Heathen Celebrations
 |
| Julbock for sale at Amazon |
But you don’t have to stop there with relegating the Julbock as a Yuletide decoration. If you have a large party on Yule, you can add your own Yule play which includes the Julbock. Celebrate Yule by wassailing. When it comes time to handing out Yule presents, who says you wouldn’t look marvelous in horns and a goat hide? Many cool possibilities here.
So, those are my thoughts on the Julbock. Maybe you have some ideas for celebrating Yule that I haven’t mentioned. Let me know how you incorporate the Julbock in your Yule.
—
Disclaimer: I’ve included some links to my affiliates in this post where I may receive a small percentage of compensation from your purchase. If you’re planning on buying ornaments or your own Julbock and enjoy this blog, I would encourage you to use my affiliate links. The money helps support this blog. Thank you.
The Last Breath of the Old Year
Yule feels more powerful up north. I say that from experience. While you could feel the race of the season towards the longest night of the year in lower latitudes, it is definitive the further north you travel. Toward yule, we lose around 4 minutes of sunlight a day, but on the flip side, we start gaining it back at the same rate.
The Entire World Takes a Breath
This time of the year feels as though the entire world has slowed down and is taking a long breath. If that makes any sense, whatsoever. The days are short. The stars are bright in the frosty sky. The quality of light is different too. Animals are working hard to find food; many of them have shown up on my land in the hopes of finding something edible.
This year, I’ve been working hard to get things done before the sun sets in the southwest horizon. Even on the opposite side of the solstice, it feels like the magic of this special time of year is still in effect.
Return of the Light
Even as I say this, on New Year’s Day it feels like the light is finally returning. It’s 12 days after Yule and we’ve gained more than a half hour of light. Still, winter is here and Skadi will be bringing us some of the coldest days we’ve had in awhile.
This year, we’re prepared for the worst of it (we hope) with enough firewood for the winter. Still, it is often a close run thing. But the sun is returning, and every day is growing longer. So, we have the promise of spring during this dark and cold time.
New Year’s Celebrations
I’ve never really been one for New Year’s celebrations. We’ve often avoided “amateur night,” as my husband blithely puts it. The fact that it is simply a man-made date on a calendar has much to do with it. Where you decide to end one year and start the next is largely subjective. Yet, much of the celebrations seem to follow our Yule. New Year’s marks the end of our Yule, and the beginning of our next year in our modern calendar. (I write this as I hear fireworks and gunshots from my neighbor’s New Year’s Eve party from a quarter mile away. I’m in a rural area; gunshots are expected.) It seems fitting to say goodbye to the year with the end of our Yule.
I had written how Yule had been primarily a non-event. That much is true. Yet, I used the time to observe nature around me while I was getting the farm chores done. It really does seem like nature does take a breath during this dark time as we turn the corner and head into the light.
Hope you had a good Yule, and I wish you the best for next year. See you on the other side.
—
Images courtesy of Magickal Graphics.
Yule as a Non-Event
First, before I launch into my blog, I really do want to wish you all a very merry Yule. I know I
missed Mother’s Night/Solstice, but honestly things have been a bit busy for me lately, so I apologize to my readers. So, without further yapping about my tardiness, let’s get to the post…
It was my intent to write about Yule, the history, and the feelings one gets this time of the year. All that went out the window when not long after hunting season ended, my husband had an operation (to repair an injury). I was suddenly thrust into doing everything. And I mean EVERYTHING.
 |
| Courtesy of Magickal Graphics |
Life Intrudes
Before I knew it, I was taking him to physical therapy, taking care of our ancient parents by driving them to doctor’s appointments, and having all the farm chores to do. This is above my normal work as a freelancer. So, I watched as Yule approached, unable to even get my house clean because too many other important things needed to be done.
On top of that, Skadi lived up to her promise to me. I had gotten a buck for hunting season, but for various and sundry reasons, I failed to get my doe. The goddess is generous and I found a freshly killed fawn just out of its spots by the side of the road, only a few hours dead and well preserved because of the negative temperatures. As I drove the deer over to the game wardens to get my salvage tag, I reflected at how redneck I’ve become. (Incidentally, the meat was good.)
The Solstice
So, I had a roast I had planned for Yule along with a bottle of my best mead. I spent the afternoon
 |
| Courtesy of Magickal Graphics |
giving water to my animals in 10 degree Fahrenheit weather. I hauled wood for the night. I finished writing blogs for a drug rehab site (stuff I get paid for), and I had to dress a deer before it got dark.
There’s something oddly primeval when you’re dressing out a deer on solstice. Even though I didn’t kill the deer, I went ahead and apologized to it for it losing it’s life in a meaningless fashion. I thanked it and Skadi for the meat. And I finished the work before it got dark.
Dinner ended up late but very good. I had some mead and reflected on how Yule wasn’t anything I envisioned. I spent the day doing things for other people. Come to think of it, that’s what I’ve been doing for the past several weeks. Instead of focusing on myself, I’ve been focusing on others.
Christmas Eve
Christmas Eve came around, and with it came a surprise kidding. I had expected another doe goat to kid first, but while I was watering the goats, I noticed two hooves sticking out of a younger doe’s rear end. I delivered the kid (a hard delivery) and to my chagrin, the doe had no milk. To top it off, the kid had been so big, he had cramped up his front legs in utero and I’m working to get them stretched out so he isn’t crippled. That makes two goat babies I have inside because the weather is so nasty.
 |
| Courtesy of Magickal Graphics |
Twelve Days of Yule
At first, I blithely announced that I was damn glad Yule goes over 12 days. Tonight, I sort of look on the whole process in despair. Whatever I thought Yule would be just isn’t going to happen, because life just is. At the same time, in between all the craziness of life, I realize that we celebrate our family and the return of the sun. And to be honest, I’m looking forward to the increase in light.
This Yule will be memorable to me. Not because of the feasting and celebrating, but more because it is about the season and my family, more than anything else. I give thanks to the gods and wights for their help, and I look forward to a better, upcoming new year.
To all of you, I hope you had a good Mother’s Night/Solstice, Christmas, and I hope you enjoy the rest of Yule.
Coming Out as a Heathen
When I’m talking about “coming out,” I’m using the term as it relates to letting loved ones know that you’re a Heathen. I can’t speak in terms of homosexuality because I am very heterosexual, but telling a loved one that I’m a Heathen was harder than you can ever imagine. If you’re a closet heathen as I was, perhaps you will glean something useful about announcing to your family you are pagan.
|
| Source: Magickal Graphics |
A Little Background
Those who have read my posts know I was raised Roman Catholic. In retrospect, I recognize that Roman Catholicism is closer to paganism than a lot of Christianity, but it isn’t heathenism by a long stretch. I even went to parochial school for a while, which in the long run made me less Christian as I started going beyond the fear of hell and damnation. Religion, in one form or another, is a method of control, in my not so humble opinion. While I am far from communist, I do think that Marx did hit it on the head that religion is an opiate of the masses.
So. with these beliefs, how could I possibly be a theist, let alone a heathen? As they say on the Facebook relationship status, “It’s complicated.” Tyr and Thor pretty much drove me back to the theist realm, even if at times I appear agnostic.
 |
| Source: Magickal Graphics |
Announcing my Heathenism
It took years for me to tell my husband I was a heathen. It was hard. Very hard. Even though he wasn’t surprised, he was puzzled why I didn’t tell him before. It’s hard to express the feelings: worry that he’ll think I’m crazy, worried that he’ll find my beliefs too weird, and a concern about what happens next. I should have spoken sooner, but I didn’t. I told him the story and I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. I supplied my own condemnation.
In the end, his response was more wait and see. Basically, he had no way to judge heathenism except through my behavior. So, I relaxed a bit and decided I was far too anxious about it. I realized that being heathen hadn’t changed who I was. I am who I am. I still celebrate the secular version of holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving, but I can now add Yule and other holidays to the mix. I’m pretty toned down when it comes to religion, so that aspect is private. (Yeah, me. Go figure.)
 |
| My response to those who say I’m going to be burning in their hell. |
Some Practical Advice
If you’re a heathen who hasn’t told your family about your change, take a deep breath and think about it. Not everyone is going to have a open mind like my husband. If, for example, you come from a Bible-belt family who is staunchly Christian, you’re probably not going to get much support from them by announcing you’re heathen. Only you can decide if it is the right thing to do, or whether they’ll ostracize you. I’d like to say it doesn’t happen, but obviously, it does. If you’re going to make the announcement, find someone in your family whom you can trust, who can also be sympathetic and helpful. If they have advice, listen. Maybe your older sister is good with you being pagan, but she knows darn well that your parents couldn’t deal with it. Maybe it’s not that important to tell them and estrange your family members.
If you don’t have a person in your family who wouldn’t be shocked by your change in religion and who can’t help you and give you good advice, ask yourself honestly what you hope to gain by letting your family know of your heathenism. It sounds harsh, but you have to understand what you hope to gain by it. Put aside the feelings of guilt that you inherited from Christianity and look logically at the best (and worst) outcomes. Will your family tell you that you are going to burn in hell for eternity and make your life hell on earth? Or are they more relaxed and open-minded? Knowing where your loved ones stand is important when it comes to whether to tell them or not.
Be Yourself
 |
| Source: Magickal Graphics |
If your family does accept your newfound faith, don’t weird them out. Instead, be yourself as you have in the past. Maybe they’re curious as to what holidays you celebrate. Don’t put their religion down when you talk to them; instead, consider drawing the parallels between the two religions. One easy time to deal with is Yule. You can point out all the similarities of Yule and Christmas and your family will enjoy learning about Yule. You can incorporate whatever you and your family have celebrated in the past while still adding pagan twists. This isn’t a particularly dogmatic religion here. Heathens have and do incorporate other traditions in our religion.
For example, I love Christmas carols. There’s no good reason for me to give them up. My husband loves medieval music, so it’s no big deal for us to incorporate seasonal music with Christmas carols. Yule and Christmas just means we have more feasts and more celebrations. I know of at least one heathen who celebrates Mother’s Night and secular Christmas. All good, in my opinion.
Being a Solitary Heathen
Telling or not telling may put you in the role of a solitary heathen. It can be lonely choosing that, but since you may be the only one in your family, whether you announce your heathenism or not, it’s pretty much the road you’re traveling. I would recommend seeking out other heathens in your community or online in order to have someone to talk to about it. There are plenty of heathens willing to talk to you and give advice. Want face-to-face time? I run into heathens all the time at science fiction conventions. Yes, you will find heathens there as well as the various gatherings for pagans.
The main thing is to keep your perspective on things. I believe strongly that your beliefs are your own, and it is yours to share or keep as you see fit. With the Internet comes groups of heathens who are willing to reach out to you as surely as the gods reached out to you. It’s your choice to decide whether to tell or not tell your family and friends. Just choose wisely.
Yule Goat
Hope you all are having a good Yule! Since Yule runs 12 days — and why not make merry for 12 days? I thought I’d leave you with a little information concerning our friend, the Yule Goat. Since Odin has the Wild Hunt on Solstice, there’s no reason Thor can’t get into the act and have his goats bring presents.
Probably not his two goats, but you get the idea. Wikipedia has a nice article on it.
May the Yule Goat bring you many presents!
Happy Yule!
An Undercover Heathen around Christmas
If you’ve been following my blog, you know what I think regarding Christ. But you may not realize that I’m a bit of an undercover heathen, especially around Christian holidays. There are many reasons for this, most being convenience and a desire to not get into an argument with family members who will not change their minds.
Merry Christmas?
Christmas is really a holiday appropriated from pagans. Rather than try to stop pagan Saturnalia, Solstice, and Yule celebrations, Christianity took the holiday and moved Christ’s supposed birthday to coincide with it. Originally Christmas was even banned in the American colonies because of the pagan origins. In fact, most of the Christmas celebrations we have now were instituted in the 19th century. Christmas trees were brought over from the Germans when Queen Victoria created Christmas in an image she wanted to see. Charles Dickens created a Christmas mythos in his novels. Basically what we have now wasn’t how Christmas was celebrated in the past.
The Feast of Yule
The Feast of Juul was pervasive in Scandinavian countries where the Yule log was lit to honor Thor. People lit bonfires to herald the return of the Sun, and those who celebrated welcomed the return of the sun as a symbol that Fimbulvetr, the long winter that preceded Ragnarok, had not come. People who gathered the ashes from the Yule log scattered them in the fields or used them for magic and medicine. In France, some folks kept the ashes under the bed to ward off lightning strikes.
Odin and the Wild Hunt
The solstice was considered the closest time when the veil between the worlds was more thinly stretched. Odin would ride Sleipnir, accompanied by the dead during the Wild Hunt. Children would leave hay for Sleipnir in their boots, and in return Odin would leave them gifts. Hmm, sounds a bit like another old guy who leaves presents for children. I wonder if they’re related? (If you don’t get the sarcasm here, check out the link first.)
Nowadays, Heathens recognize the twelve days of Yule starting with Solstice or Mother’s Night — the time of the year when our northern hemisphere is closest to the world of the dead. The shortest day of the year even feels magical. Especially up north, you’re more likely to see auroras, snow, and just a more magical landscape.
A Heathen in a Christian Land
For those of you who celebrate Yule, the season is indeed magical. For those of us whose families are mostly Christian, Christmas season can be wearing. I actually do love the trappings of Christmas, because, by golly, they’re Heathen with very little disguise. My thought is perhaps even though we do celebrate Christmas, it’s actually celebrating Yule, and maybe that’s all that counts. I certainly have a special celebration of the solstice as part of the festivities.
